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Failure, Government, Great Plains, History, Hopelessness, Humor, Satire, Shortcomings, South Dakota, Uncategorized

Noem pulls out all stops, and some cadavers to defend her pal Trump. But evidence missing.

By Gary Dickson, Hokum Gazette Political Writer JEFFERSON, SD — South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem has been making sure she stays in the media spotlight even though her friend and mentor, President Donald Trump has lost the 2020 presidential election to former Vice President Joseph Biden. Many media pundits as well social media commentators have been wondering what the governor plans to do now that … Continue reading Noem pulls out all stops, and some cadavers to defend her pal Trump. But evidence missing.

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Community, Failure, Government, Health, Hopelessness, Humor, People, Personal Qualities, Satire, Uncategorized

Why Be Normal?

I was fairly certain the people who voted for him in 2016 would wake up and get smart about this guy. They’d figure out how much he’d lied, how he led them down the path to financial ruin. That the U.S. had become the laughing stock in international circles. For sure they’d see how Trump and his family were profiting financially from him being in office. Continue reading Why Be Normal?

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Agriculture, Community, Government, Great Plains, Humor, Rural Life, Satire, South Dakota, Uncategorized

South Dakota Governor Supports Meat Packing Industry By Wearing Raw Hamburger Hat

We’re individuals. We’re rugged individuals. We wear slabs of meat and drape ourselves with sausage that’s probably made out of somebody’s neighbors the butcher didn’t care for. And we LIKE IT!” Continue reading South Dakota Governor Supports Meat Packing Industry By Wearing Raw Hamburger Hat

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Attention Minimizers and Refuseniks: Here’s an Uplifting Tale of Woe and Intrigue.

We certainly do live in interesting times.

What appears to be a majority of Americans are willing to follow guidelines and orders from their state’s governors or city’s mayors to shelter at home, to not gather in groups larger than 10 people, to close non-essential businesses, to close schools, etc. so they won’t get infected with or infect others with the Coronavirus aka covid-19.

However, since this is the United States of America, there are a vocal, active minority who chafe at such government directives and stubbornly refuse to follow the guidelines, complaining that they are an infringement upon their rights and liberties — even though there appears to be plenty of scientific evidence for the effectiveness of adhering to such rules. South Dakota appears to be blessed with its share of these folks with fatal wishes.

This reminds me of a story that was told to me. I think it’s especially appropriate to times like these. Continue reading Attention Minimizers and Refuseniks: Here’s an Uplifting Tale of Woe and Intrigue.

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Career, Failure, Government, Great Plains, Health, Humor, People, Personal Qualities, Satire, Shortcomings, South Dakota

Physician Board Determines Gnome Dumbest Governor; Gives Rep. Chris Karr First-Ever Heinrich Himmler Award

At its regular quarterly meeting on Tuesday, the South Dakota Medical Forum named current governor, Krispie Gnome as the dumbest governor in state history. The medical group also handed out one other special award to Rep. Chris Karr, R-Sioux Falls naming him the winner of the first-ever Heinrich Himmler Personification of Evil Award. Continue reading Physician Board Determines Gnome Dumbest Governor; Gives Rep. Chris Karr First-Ever Heinrich Himmler Award

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Community, Government, Health, Humor, Motivation, Satire, South Dakota

Governor Introduces Game To Keep South Dakotans Entertained During Coronavirus Outbreak: “What’s Under Krispie’s Hat?”

As a way to help citizens of South Dakota pass the time while at home self-quarantining or social distancing during the coronavirus outbreak, Gov. Krispie Gnome has created a game individuals and entire families can play each day. Continue reading Governor Introduces Game To Keep South Dakotans Entertained During Coronavirus Outbreak: “What’s Under Krispie’s Hat?”

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SD Speed Limits To Be Raised In Order To Enhance Social Distancing; Build-It-Yourself Coronavirus Test Kits Available By Mail Order

The governor, a clear-eyed woman from Hamlin County, said she figured there was no better way of helping people to socially distance themselves than to be able to drive faster to get away from others. And in the case of the two interstates – a whole lot faster! She also said it didn’t bother much that school zone speed limits would be eliminated. Gnome said she thought the lives saved through social distancing would be far more than the number of children who would be injured or killed by speeding cars near schools. All in all, it was a good trade-off for citizens to get some peace of mind, she said. Continue reading SD Speed Limits To Be Raised In Order To Enhance Social Distancing; Build-It-Yourself Coronavirus Test Kits Available By Mail Order

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Caring, Community, Failure, Government, Great Plains, Health, Hopelessness, Humor, People, Satire, South Dakota, Uncategorized

Lawmakers & Gov Hold Closed Confab On COVID-19 Fears; Get New Biohazard Duds

But perhaps the most shocking action to come out of Wednesday’s meeting was the lawmakers getting their own, custom-designed biohazard coverings. As seen in the photo, the outfits were all quite colorful and included special nose protectors, a heavy colored paint-like substance to cover their faces, and colorful hair, hand, and feet coverings. Continue reading Lawmakers & Gov Hold Closed Confab On COVID-19 Fears; Get New Biohazard Duds

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Government, Health, Humor, Satire, Uncategorized

Pence swings for the fence in effort to combat Coronavirus at source; Orders attack on bats – wooden, aluminum, and plastic

Vice President Mike Pence today announced a new federal health program with a focus on bats, in an effort to get to the origins of the Coronavirus or COVID-19. He said they would first shut down all bat-manufacturing factories in the United States starting with the Louisville Slugger Plant in Louisville, KY. Next up was sealing off the country’s borders to prevent any importing of bats – wooden or aluminum – made outside of the U.S. Continue reading Pence swings for the fence in effort to combat Coronavirus at source; Orders attack on bats – wooden, aluminum, and plastic

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Community, Government, Great Plains, Health, Humor, People, Rural Life, Satire, Small towns, South Dakota, Uncategorized

Governor Appoints Coronavirus Wrangling Posse, South Dakota At ‘Itsy-Bitsy Risk’, She Says

By G. L. Dickson, P & W Health Scout PIERRE, SD – In a response to the burgeoning possibility faced by the state’s executive office and certain legislators as well as key political benefactors of becoming infected with Covid-19 (the Coronavirus), South Dakota Governor Krispie Gnome today announced she has formed a special committee to advise her and her relatives about dealing with the spread … Continue reading Governor Appoints Coronavirus Wrangling Posse, South Dakota At ‘Itsy-Bitsy Risk’, She Says

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Obscure Facts About South Dakota & Thereabouts — [A series]

Myron Floren Was Known As “El Loco With A Squeezebox” When Attending Augustana College You may have known him best from seeing the handsome, wavy-haired man play tunes like “Lady of Spain” and “Beer Barrel Polka” on television’s Lawrence Welk Show. But what you may not have known was that the “Happy Norwegian” as fellow Dakotan Welk dubbed him, had a rowdier side to him … Continue reading Obscure Facts About South Dakota & Thereabouts — [A series]

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Community, Government, Health, Humor, People, Satire, Sioux Falls, South Dakota, Uncategorized

Governor Aims To Stop Spread of Coronavirus Through Phone Lines, ISPs, and Satellite Signals

“Well, I’m here to tell you, that the buck stops in Kansas, not in South Dakota! So yesterday, or maybe it was the day before . . . anyway, recently I informed my Secretary of Health, Kim Balsam – Rotisserie that we needed to alert all the local health offices about watching for people who’ve contracted the disease through their computers, TV sets, cell phones, land lines, ham radios, and car radios. She’s sending out letters via overnight mail – not using email, of course, ‘cause it might be infected. Continue reading Governor Aims To Stop Spread of Coronavirus Through Phone Lines, ISPs, and Satellite Signals

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Agriculture, Community, Great Plains, History, Humor, Relationships, Rural Life, Satire, South Dakota, Uncategorized

Obscure Facts About South Dakota & Thereabouts: First in a series

First marriage between a man and a sheep – March 24, 1902 A Hollander by the name of Harm Harmelink (top photo, riding horse) and a purebred Ramboulet ewe named Violet (bottom photo) tied the knot in rural northern Butte County. It is said that Mr. Harmelink,46, who was technically an East Friesian, had been distraught the previous fall, as he was the only one … Continue reading Obscure Facts About South Dakota & Thereabouts: First in a series

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Study Shows Most Sioux Falls Residents Unaware Rest of State Exists

By Gary Dickson Geography Correspondent BROOKINGS, SD – A recent study conducted by a professor from South Dakota State University found that 74 percent of Sioux Falls adults were unaware that South Dakota encompassed anything beyond 25 miles from Sioux Falls’ borders. And, as shocking as these results were, 46 percent of adults 24 and older thought they were a suburb of Minneapolis! The research was … Continue reading Study Shows Most Sioux Falls Residents Unaware Rest of State Exists

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Agriculture, Community, Government, Great Plains, Humor, People, Rural Life, Satire, South Dakota

Surrogacy Ban Has Ranchers Twitchy

By Gary Dickson P & W Agribusiness Reporter Many of South Dakota’s livestock producers are displeased about a State House bill that would ban commercial surrogacy agents. Ranchers and farmers with livestock operations are sounding the alarm that the bill would severely limit the practice of artificial insemination of cows, horses, buffalo, sheep, goats, llamas, ostriches, and other hooved and feathered creatures in the Rushmore … Continue reading Surrogacy Ban Has Ranchers Twitchy

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SD Legislature Considers Closing Interstates 90 and 29 Most of Year

By Gary Dickson PIERRE, SD – A new bill that would close both Interstate-29 and Interstate-90 in South Dakota for 10 months a year was introduced in the state senate today. The purpose of the bill, according to sponsors, is to save the state money and enhance the economic development of those communities that the building of the interstates passed by in the 1960s and … Continue reading SD Legislature Considers Closing Interstates 90 and 29 Most of Year

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Community, Great Plains, Humor, Iowa, Satire, Siouxland, Uncategorized

Jesus Makes Appearance During Le Mars’ Annual Ice Cream Days

Hundreds of pilgrims have been making a journey to Le Mars, Iowa this weekend. And it wasn’t just to have a scoop or two of pistachio nut ice cream on a waffle cone in this town known as The Ice-Cream Capitol of the World. They were coming to hopefully catch a glimpse of the image of Jesus Christ in a cement ice cream cone sculpture. Continue reading Jesus Makes Appearance During Le Mars’ Annual Ice Cream Days

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Career, Caring, Community, Failure, Government, Great Plains, Hopelessness, Humor, People, Perserverence, Personal Qualities, Relationships, Rural Life, Satire, South Dakota, Talent, Uncategorized

4th graders to learn magical thinking next year.

Gov. Noem thinks it would be an excellent idea if South Dakota’s school children could start thinking more like her. In other words, Noem wants them to be taught magical thinking as part of their fourth-grade curriculum. Continue reading 4th graders to learn magical thinking next year.

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Angry Marchers Converge On Mitchell’s Corn Palace To Protest Coronavirus Lockdown

Today, marchers and protesters assembled in front of the World’s Only Corn Palace in Mitchell to make their voices heard about South Dakota’s coronavirus lockdown decree. The protesters said they were going to try to prevent the state lawmakers from getting into the building and conducting the legislative session. Continue reading Angry Marchers Converge On Mitchell’s Corn Palace To Protest Coronavirus Lockdown

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